Back at the hospital again today........

Well we were back at the hospital again today for my youngest son Christopher again. He has an upper respiratory infection now. Two weeks ago it was strep throat and then two days later TJ was in the hospital with strep throat. Then the same night Eddie went to the hospital and had an upper respiratory infection, then to top it all off Teresa ( Eddie's sister) went to the hospital for a URI also. Now, two weeks later its Christopher again. Usually every year Im the one that ends up with the URI taking antibiotics. But "knock on wood" I havent had it yet.
Thank you JESUS. Although it does suck that every one keeps getting sick . Hopefully it'll be over soon. I start work on Monday so I'm sure that I will be getting some kind of virus or something that goes around the nursing home at some point. I really hope not but ....you know how that goes. Well we got Teresa's new computer today and I am soooo not use to having a huge flat screen monitor in my face to blind me. It's pretty cool though. Anyway, I just wanted to blog for a minute, I have to finish Eddie's 2 cakes!!!!LOL.

Yes! I graduated....

Well guys I graduated nursing school finally. I also got the highest clinical score in my class of 25 people. Damn, Im good. I really had a blast in this course. It was full of fun and if you ask my mom, she will tell you just what she observed at graduation. It was fun also. I start work on Monday. Today, I went to facility orientation.
The facility is a 132 bed facility. WOW!!! So as you can see...I will be plenty busy when I start work. It was really a lifechanging experience for me. If anyone has been contimplating nursing ...do it. It is so fun and you learn so much stuff that is useful in everyday life. So, I am now a certified dementia specialist, certified in CPR, and soon to be certified in Nursing assistant role also. I am so proud of myself. I did it yall!!! As you can tell I am excited about it. Just wanted to touch base with you guys and catch you up while I had a minute to blog to yall! See yall later!

Good news and bad news....

The good news is that I am finally graduating nursing school on Thursday May 29th at 3:00pm. The bad news is that My computer had a virus the changes its name every time I try to delete it. So as soon as I get it wiped clean and reinstall Windows XP again. I will be back up and running. oday is a hard day for me , it has been 9 months today since Clay's accident and it's also my oldest son TJ's birthday. He is 8 years old today. Getting older. Just wanted to share the news and let you guys know why I haven't blogged in a while. Hopefully it'll be fixed soon. Keep your fingers crossed for me. See you guys later.

EXTREMELY EXCITED AND HAPPY FINALLY!!

Hi guys. Im back now. Sorry it has taken me so long to get back to blogging but I finally started nursing school on Monday and it has been great. We had a test on our 2nd day of class and I passed with a final score of.......107....which is a perfect score. I had the highest score in the class. I felt soo good about myself. Why? Because this year I have been out of school settings for 10 years and BOOM I still have it baby! What can I say? I ain't skeered!!!
I feel really good about this class and school has been my dream for almost 10 years now and it feels great to have God tell me that I am answering a call for some elderly resident in a facility that has no family or that needs to see your smile and your constant attention and compassion and love given to them. It makes me feel good.
As far as the house thing goes-well I may be putting it on the market to sale it to save my credit but the good news is that there is a new home for rent for alot less than what Im paying across the street from me now that went up for rent today and we are waiting on the lady to get back to us on it. So maybe things do happen for a reason. God works in misterious ways and I believe it. God bless him.
The family cookout went really well. Im not sure yet if mama posted any pic.s but trust me there was pic.s and video taken. We all had a great time. We got to visit with Kathy and Lil C aka CJ and had a wonderful time. The children had a blast playing over the grill roasting marshmellows. It was a great end to last week and a great start to this week. I am out of school tomarrow and will probably be studying some more and maybe back online. See you tomarrow. Keep me in your prayers.

All 4 boy's this weekend!!!! HHHEEELLLPPPP!!!!

Well as for the fishing trip I didn't whoop Eddie's butt like I had hoped for. Oh well, there's always next time. LOL! The only thing that I caught was a hellacious sunburn. OUCH! It hurts like hell too. We caught 1 fish a piece that was keepers and like 2 or 3 that we had to throw back due to they were too small to keep. Our neighbor's Ronnie and his wife Mary Jane went along in their boat and they had no luck either. As a matter of fact the last time Eddie and Ronnie went fishing they caught quite a few and Mary Jane asked Eddie where he and Ronnie baught all those fish they "caught" the last time.. LOL! I thought that was funny. All in alll we had a good day though. Like Eddie said " a bad day of fishing is better than any good day at work". Agreed.
On the other hand we have all four boys this weekend. Yeah for us huh? They arent being too bad so far--Knock on Wood. Hopefully they will be good this weekend. Sometimes they are sometimes they arent. Just like me, they have good day's and bad days. The rain has finally moved in here and hopefully it'll move out by tomarrow for the cookout. No offence mama, but I dont think that burgers in the oven would be any good. Neither would all 7 boys locked up in the house with us! LMAO!
My mom has the baby, Lil Clay, today for a few hours and that's probably why she hasnt been online. She will have lots of fun with him, he is soooo precious. He's my little piece of heaven--Literally. Well short and sweet today. Im sure we'll hear all about the baby stories in a little while. LOL. Until next time.....

Life, What the HELL is going on???

Well first of all I need to start by saying sorry to Pualius for steeling his title to his blog but I really needed it for this one. Sorry!!! Well so far today my day has gone pretty well. We are planning on going fishing tomarrow since the weather is suppose to be beautiful! Hopefully I'll whoop Eddie's butt!!!LOL. I have talked to my mom today, two of my sister's, and got to spend most of the day with Eddie. Good thing!
I am still looking forward to going to my mom's this weekend for the cookout. But I am still worried about the foreclosure deal. I got a certified letter in the mail today from the mortgage company....NOT GOOD! Oh well all I can do is take it one day at a time and hopefully good things will come out of my patience. Although that is a virtue that I never have been good with.
I do have a prayer going out tonight for a young lady that both of my brothers went to school with. Her 3 year old son died on Sunday from Leaukemia. My prayers are with Tabitha at this moment. I can only imagine what she is going through right now. I feel soooo sorry for her.
well that's pretty much all I have to say today. Just have alot of stuff to do today to get ready for tomarrow. Wish me luck.

Maybe things aren't getting so much better???

Well things were looking up until today I recevied a 30 day right to cure on my house-which means if I don't come up with at least $2300.00 in a month then I will have to put my house on the market and sell it or either let them foreclose on me. AGGGHHHHH!!! I dont have the money to move or even for a downpayment. Also, I'm fixing to start school Monday and wont be drawing a paycheck for at least 4 weeks after that! So anyone have any suggestions???
The good news is I got to babysit my newest nephew yesterday while his mommy went to her horseback riding lessons. He just lights up my life. Pretty much the same way Clay did. I wont say that he fills the hole in my heart from Clay going away...but he seems to for the moments that Im with him. He is the most precious thing ever. I took like 9 pic.s of him and as soon as I have time to download them I promise I will.
God, I'm scared of what is going to happen next with life??? I know dont ever ask that! But I wasnt asking I was making a statement. The med.'s are finally working and in my system good now so Im doing alot better. I know God is a busy man and I hope that he hear's our prayer's every night and can help me out with my situation on the house. The lottery winning number's would help...LOL!!! Sorry people just short and sweet today. I have things to do tonight and get kid's ready for school tomarrow. TTYL! You will all be in my prayer's as usual. Thank You to everyone who supports me with encouraging words when Im down. I do only have 2 people I can really talk to other than whomever is reading my blogs. It really does help me alot though. Thank You to all of you.

Getting Better FINALLY!!!!

Well I went to a job interview last Monday (the same day my mom got admitted to the hospital) and it went great. There was an add in the newpaper for a nursing home near home and I decided to go check it out. I went online posted my application and within hours they were calling me wanting an interview. Come to find out it is a job opening for a CNA and they will send me to school and pay for my schooling. The only downfall is that the classes are held in Easley (my hometown) which is like 35 minutes from here and with gas prices and me not working it's gonna be hard to pay for gas back and forth. They are very strict in the classes also. You arent allowed to miss one day. If you do then they will drop you like a bad habit. After I go to class for about 2 weeks, I should earn my 16 hour certificate and then be able to work some at the facility. But how do I pay bills in the mean time??? Or gas expenses???
I am currently over 90 days past due on my mortgage payment and I am worried that they are going to foreclose on me soon. I start my 1st round of vaccinations on Monday(tomarrow). Then another one -one month from that one , then another round 3 months later. I have already passed the drug test and the interview and the Tiberculosis test. So that much is out of the way. I am very excited about it and am looking forward to it. I have also gotten back on my med.'s and am feeling a little better. Thank you Jesus! He does work in mysterious ways.
On the up-side, mom is starting to feel a little better a little at a time. Thank You to paulius for keeping everyone updated on her care. I was really worried about her. Now I'm worried that my only brother may end up in a restitution center for 6 months to a year over something that he wasnt at fault for. That's all I need is for him to get sent off too. He's the only brother I have left. They started my oldest son, TJ out on some depression med.'s and we're hoping that they are gonna work. Pray for me guys. I need all the prayers I can get right now. God only knows I have worn his prayer list out. His ear probably hurts by now.LOL. I start school next Monday. YEAH!!!
Well guys I have kids to bathe and put to bed so I have to go now. Hopefully I'll continue to have better luck with things.

Verge of a Nervous Breakdown....but who cares???

I finally got to see my brother Frank, his wife Marie , and there cute little one's on Sat. It made me feel a little better but not much cause I just felt worse leaving. I am no longer working on top of all things and to tell you the truth of the matter-Im too stressed out to work. But I have put in applications today--thanks for the info Tee.
You know how when you have been in a cockroach infested place and you turn the light on on them and they all scatter and never gather back up??? well that's what my family did after my daddy died 2 years ago and they have stayed that way. I talk to 2 of my family members on a somewhat regular basis---my mom, and Tee- my sister. Thats sad. I did however get one thing that was good on friday....I got my court date for my divorce . Its April 3rd . Yeh. Thank you for that blessing God. My oldest son is on spring break this week for 10 days---HELP> I did get my med.s back today and have been taking them the correct way this time. So im trying to eliminate things one thing at a time. I feel a nervous breakdown coming soon. Im not exagerating either. Things are that bad. Even though I try not to show it much. Gotta say goodbye for now gotta put kids in the bed now. Marie if you read this - I'll bring TJ down for a couple days to spend the night with Devon probably on Weds. He has a doctors appointment at 10:30 and after that I'll bring him down there. I promised him and devon. LOve yall.

So I'm back again now...

Well people, I'm back and still just as stressed as ever. I cant help but wander if I let my house go, be put on the market so that it doesnt show as a foreclosure on my credit-Would things change for the better? Probably not. Well I have really be family sick for some reason lately. I really miss my family. Since my daddy passed 2 years ago, the family just drifted apart and really nobody comunicates anymore other then me, mama, Tee, and Nina. And mama is the only one other than Tee that I talk to regularly. It sucks. And now that I live in BFE 30 minutes away from Easley I really dont see or hear from anyone anymore. I dont hear from mom anymore since she moved in with Dennis in Greenville and that sucks b/c usually she was around every day or at least every other day. I actually like seeing family on a regular basis. Most of the family anyway.
I still havent come to a conclusion yet on going back to school. It still seems to me that we arent going to be able to afford it. So what do I do? Follow my dreams and go back to school like I have been wanting to do?-But if i do that then I am looking at losing the house and putting it on the market for sale and coming up with a solution to keep my child at the same school and come up with a deposit on a rental home. I dont want to let the house go really b/c Eddie and I have put so much into it in the past year and a half. Why cant these things be easier??? I am so stressed out lately that I dont know whether I am coming or going.By the way I now have a myspace page if anyone cares. My user url is www.myspace.com/julie_howe28. If you would like to you can visit there as well. Sorry it has taken me so long to blog but I have been dealing with too much lately and dont hardly even have time to think. And to add to the worry, Justin';s birthday as well as my sister's birthday is Sat. March 22, and I dont have the money for even a birthday card for either one of them. Then we have Easter two weeks early this year which as you know the Easter bunny cant afford 2 easter baskets this year. What to do? What to do?? See drama comes like a downpor for me. When it rains it floods. Let me tell ya. I'm relly beginning to wander if life is really worth all of the drama and confusion if you cant at least be happy? What do yall think? I'll try to take some more pic.s as soon as possible for you guys but to let you know so that I dont get tagged this week- I'm working most of the week this week. That's all for now. See yall later.

Finally...Hear all about it--they did!

Hello all. Today is looking up-Thank God. Well here is the pic.'s I promised. The love's of my life. Sometime's they just make you smile no matter how bad you feel. Gotta love em'. Hope you guys enjoy these. I thought they were great. So did my mom. We all got a good laugh out of this.
I got in touch with the medicaid office and gave them hell and needless to say I got my way. I have to bring her some info on Monday and the children will have medicaid again. Thank You Jesus. I dont have too much to say today except thank you for all thge support you guys offer. I just love the blogger world. I can rant and rave without knowing yall are rolling your eyed at me! It's ok I know you are I just dont want to see it. Yeh I know just like my mother Huh? I dont have to much to say today. Just wanted to get the pic.'s on here. bye.

It's a new day...

Well mama, I guess you're right. I just feel like the bad outways the good. Like today- I found out that they have canceled our medicade and with TJ's prescriptions being $180.00 a month and all of his help he has been getting at school and therapists and councelors, etc....I dont know what to do now! He has just now started getting the help that he needs to be doing good.
I'm so pissed off right now. Now that means that I won't be able to attend school because as usual something is gonna come between me and my dream once again. Only this time it's not a piece of shit man. Now it's that I cant afford it. I told you guys in the other blog that that's what I was worried about. Damn, I have a good intuition. The only thing left to say on this subject is I TOLD YOU SO!!!!! Damnit.
I'm relly not up to writing much today due to this crappy weather, the bad news yet another day brings, and I have got to get things done before Eddie goes to work tonight. I also have a terrible headache and just am worn out today. I only got 4 1/2 hours of sleep last night. See you guys later. Love you mama! Miss you too!

Wandering About Hex's....HMMMMM!!!

Have you ever wondered if you really believe in the " HEX "? Well, for the past two years I have seriously been wondering about it. Two years ago, I lost my grandfather whom I was very close to and then in July of this past year I had a miscarriage with twins. Then in August of this past year, I lost my baby brother in a tragic car accident. Yesterday my sister called me to notify me that she was in TN at a hospital in the middle of nowhere with my niece, whom is pregnant with twins. She is only 31 weeks and that's not good.
Well yesterday I went to my sister-n-law's house to see my new nephew and I got upset last night just thinking that my brother would be soooo proud of that beautiful baby right now. Why is life so unfair that the good one's are taken from us? Isn't that kindof backwards. Why rid us of the good one's when the drug addicts and murderers and sex offenders are still walking around with their life??? This subject really bothers me. I think about my baby brother every single day and everyone tells me that time will heal the hurt. Well there wrong! To me, time only helps the realism of the situation-not the real pain that you feel for the loss of a loved one. The pain never gets better and it never goes away.
Anyway, I got really upset last night and said a prayer to God and to my brother. Which isnt anything new because since he was taken from us I have talked to him every day. I just really am beginning to wander if my family has a hex or a curse on it! It seems that way. Is anything gonna get any better? God I hope so.
Tonight my sister calls me back to inform me that she is taking my niece back to the hospital due to her contractions have started again. Im really worried about her right now. well I hope everything goes alright tonight with her and the twins. I'll say a prayer for them tonight.
Sorry that it has taken me a few days to blog again but I have got so much going on right now that Im lucky to even be thinking right. Things are just kinda hectic at times around here and I've been thinking alot about going back to school. If I go back to school then I'm not sure that we can afford for me to, but on the other hand I keep telling myself that if i don't go now- I'll put it off forever and I'll never go like I want to. What to do? Hell if I know! If ya have any comments on the subjects listed above then I'd love to hear them. As for now, Im gonna sign off for tonight and go take some medicine for my nerves and go relax for a while. Look forward to hearing from you guys again. By th eway I'm gonna try to post this pic of all 4 boys on this blog. Hope it works. Keep your fingers crossed for me.

Tired, Bored, and NOT ready for tomarrow.....

Well today is much better. My pain isn't nearly as bad as it was-Thank God! Only thing is - I'm tired and worn slam the hell out today. I havent had much time to talk to anyone today so consider yourselves lucky to be hearing from me today. And tomarrow you probably wont hear from me at all tomarrow. Working 12p-12a tomarrow. That sucks. But I keep trying to make it sound better in my head by telling myself it's only gonna be 1and 1/2 hours longer than I was there today. I stand on concrete floors all day, dont get a lunch break or any breaks for that matter- no matter how long I work. It is horrible on your feet-trust me.
My oldest son, TJ's med.'s still arent ready at the pharmacy and he takes his last pill tomarrow. That is gonna SUCK!!!! He had a really bad day at school today. He got a note sent home from the teacher saying that he was crawling around under the tables, walking and wandering around the room, didnt even attepmt to do ANY of his work so he had it all sent home for me to help him with after I worked 10 and 1/2 hours today. Yeh, 3 more hours of aggitation and rude comments and smart mouth comments. Needless to say he went to bed extremely early tonight and as well he didnt get to play at all after his homework since he couldnt do his work at school and played instead-then he already had his play time in, RIGHT???? I know mean mom. Yeh, Yeh, Yeh!
Also in the meantime of all of this Eddie was in an ill mood all day and hardly even spoke to anyone. That made things easier. Yeh right. Well I would like to apologize to my mom, Sunny, for not being able to make her a birthday cake this year. I'm sorry mom. I felt terrible b/c I usually make her cake for ehr every year- but with the dentist visits and the pain just wouldnt allow it this time. I'll make it up to her somehow though. I love you mama. Guys, as badly as I hate to- I'm gonna sign off for now and get a shower and get ready for bed. Long day calling tomarrow. See you guys Friday hopefully. As soon as i figure out how, Im gonna post pictures of all 4 of our boys for you guys to see. TTYL-Goodnight- Sleep tight-and hopefully there are no bed bugs that are gonna bite. B/c I have had enough bad luck for a lifetime. See Ya.

Well I'm Back-Finally

Hey people, sorry I couldnt blog sooner but my internet went out as well as my cable and telephone for 2 days. Now I'm back and running. Starting to feel better and rest when I can. Well, hope everyone had a good monday and Tuesday. I had a good Monday but today I'm tired . Not sleeping well lately. Havent gotten to talk much to my family this week already and its kinda hard on me being away from my baby's.
Just wanted to let you guys know that I am back up and hope to hear from someone soon. I am looking forward to going to Greenville Tech to tke the placement test and pay the application fee's and get signed up for my classes. I am so excited. I have been wanting to go to school since the year I graduated and now I have set my mind that Im going to now.
I want my mom and other special family members that have been supportive with me through rough times in my life such as Tee, Clayton, Daddy, Frank, Eddie, Mama, Paul, my other mom, and a few others but these are the main one's I want to be proud that I made something of myself instead of waisting my life away with Sh*thole jobs. Know what I mean?
Well guts, Im gonna sign off it's late and once again I have to get up at 4:30am. TTYL.

And so it starts......

Well the good day is gone. Turns out I went to the dentist and had a tooth extracted last Monday and it has somehow gotten infected. So now i have got to get up at 4:30 AM ang go to my first day on a new job and then whenever I get off go back to this jerk dentist to see what now???? Probably more pain and suffering for another week. Just my luck. So for the past 3 days I have been rinsing every 30-45 minutes with peroxide----NASTY----!!!!!!
Anyway, to top all of this off, my oldest son TJ, is fixing to run out of ADHD medication and the doctor's office is a pain in the A** to get the script from. My mouth hurts so bad that I can't sleep, I'm trying to eat regardless of the pain, and having to get up too early in the morning to deal with all this all over again. Yeah. Then I had trouble signing in to my blog to write another one. Im telling you this weekend has been rough.
There is only one thing that I can say good about this weekend. I got my pin from Greenville Tech so that I can start the process to go back to school. Now I just have to go and take the placement test and pay the application fee's. Hopefully thing's will start to turn around soon. Oh, and by the way there is already some drama that I'm being warned about at my new job and it's not looking good. Hell unemployment was offering more a week than this new job b/c I will only be working 20 hours a week. That's sad right? I know. Tell me about it.
CAN ANYONE SAY VACATION???????????? I CAN DREAM CAN'T I ?????????Sorry I havent checked in in a while but I have had a hell of a time this weekend. Hopefully I can do better this week. By the way tomarrow is SUNNY'S Birthday if anyone know's her and wish her a happy birthday. I can't tell you how old she is b/c then she would kill me. Although she is suppose to be coming to see me tomarrow and spend some time with me since I don't get to see her much. Maybe that will help my week.-----PAIN PILL PLEASE----Sorry I'm in pain. well guys its late and I have to get up at 4:30am in the morning so I'm gonna go for now.TTYL......Happy Birthday Mama. I Love You very much.

Finally, A Good Day!

Last night, my sister-n-law, Kathy had her very first child. He was born at 11:15pm on February 19th. She lost her husband (my brother) back in August of 2007 due to a tragic car accident and has endured the pregnancy with the support of family an friends. She named him Charles Clayton Howe Jr. He was 6 lbs. 13.7 oz. and 18 1/2 inches long. He is beautiful. The most precious thing ever, other than of course my two children, and my brother Clay.

This has been about the best day I have had since August when we lost him. But I know he is proud of his son and will watch over him and Kathy. He always has. My mom, Sunny, is just exstatic about the new edition. She is soooooo very proud-as we all are. One thing is for sure though, he will be cherished and loved very much. Not to mention the PRINCE in the family. Although he does look like a prince. Anywho, we are all proud of him and are very happy that he is here. We have been waiting a long time for his arrival and now he is here. All of the worrying is over and we can just be here for the two people who need us the most-Kathy and Baby Clay. Maybe now we will be able to carry out a good nights rest.